"Supernovae can briefly outshine entire galaxies and radiate more energy than our sun will in its entire lifetime." Andrea Thompson
This will not be the normal "how to" blog post.
A certain message has been on my heart since last week, but I haven't yet been able to find the words.
I remember when I first decided to start on this journey of healing, you were among the first to not only support me, but also to push me. I met you through a mutual friend and without hesitation, you became a part of my tribe. An essential part that I didn't know that I needed.
When I first received my diagnosis, you sent words of encouragement. You helped me to remember that a diagnosis is not the end, but actually a beginning. Once something is named, you can begin to address it and then conquer it. So, I did.
When depression had taken over and I felt there was no fighting it, and the entire Mindfulness Movement had no purpose, you said "It's a blessing to have people like you that speak on mental health and overall well being. Keep doing great things!" So, I will.
In a lot of ways, you were a hero to me. You were a reminder of the light that rests in certain people. And girl, you had a light like no other. Every image in my mind of you is with the brightest. most beautiful smile. I can't un-see it.
You were a rarity. A supernova. Though supernovae shine brightly for only a short period of time, they radiate so much light and energy. It is impossible to ignore. You were impossible to ignore.
This battle, it wasn't easy. I know that you fought so incredibly hard and despite what it looks like to anyone else, I am proud of you. You saved me in so many ways, and I hate that I couldn't save you, but I will take your words with me. Your light will continue to shine through me and other lives that you were able to touch. Thank you for sharing your light, your energy, and your heART.
Rest well, Nik. Rest well.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800.273.8255